Women less happy after 40 years of feminism

Despite wealth, health and opportunity, men still more content says study by US National Bureau of Economic Research

On the long and winding road to having it all, Helen Parker is making good progress. At 27 she’s forging a career as an executive with a transport company in London, she has a steady boyfriend, and together they are buying a flat. One day the prospect of starting a family will beckon.

By many standards, she’s thriving. So is she happy?

“Um, I’m reasonably happy,” she said. “And I’m optimistic about the future. But there will always be sacrifices.

“There’s plenty more opportunities for women than there used to be — but then again, that means you are always questioning whether the moves you have made are correct, or whether you should have done something else.”

Like many women, her sense of wellbeing and life satisfaction do not match up with advances in social circumstances and material comforts. After 40 years of fighting for equality, it seems that women are no happier. In fact, women in many countries have been growing steadily unhappier compared with men, according to a study published this month by the National Bureau of Economic Research in the United States.

In The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness, Betsey Stevenson and Justin Wolfers of the University of Pennsylvania, begin by noting the gains.

“By many measures the progress of women over recent decades has been extraordinary: the gender wage gap has partly closed; educational attainment has risen and is now surpassing that of men; women have gained an unprecedented level of control over fertility; (and) technological change in the form of new domestic appliances has freed women from domestic drudgery,” they wrote.

Yet Stevenson and Wolfers have found that in America women’s happiness, far from rising, has fallen “both absolutely and relatively to that of men”. Where women in the 1970s reported themselves to be significantly happier than men, now for the first time they are reporting levels of happiness lower than men.

In Europe, people’s sense of happiness has risen slightly, but less so for women than men. In 12 European countries, including Britain, the happiness of women has fallen relative to that of men.

The authors readily admit that measuring happiness is necessarily a subjective task, but the overall trend from the data, compiled from social surveys conducted over many years, is clear and compelling.

The work builds on earlier research by Andrew Oswald, professor of economics at Warwick University, who has a particular interest in the study of happiness. He said: “What Betsey and Justin have done, which is a valuable addition, is to show that the trend is found rather widely. For most of the post-war era, happiness surveys showed women noticeably happier than men. That difference has now eroded to zero.”

The big question is: why?

When measures of women’s happiness started to dip, some sociologists reached for a simple solution known as the “second shift”. Women’s opportunities in paid employment had increased, but their domestic load had not correspondingly reduced. The belief was that they were going out to work then doing a “second shift” at home — no wonder they weren’t ecstatic.

Sorry, that won’t wash, say Stevenson and Wolfers. Surveys of how individuals spend their time show that for both men and women total work hours (combining paid or domestic) have declined since 1965.

Yes, women’s hours of “market work” have increased, but that has been offset by “large declines in their non-market work”. At the same time “men are now working fewer hours in the market and more hours in home production”.

On a purely statistical basis, women can’t argue their burden has got worse or is now drastically unequal.

However, more subtle influences should be considered, argues Dame Joan Bakewell, the broadcaster, because women’s emotional responses to the change in circumstances are different from those of men.

“Women do stub their toes on the work-life balance much more than men,” she said. “Even if they have solved it (in practical terms), they worry about it.

“So they are probably going to say, ‘Well, I’m not as happy as I could be because I’m carrying this burden of worry’.”

Others suggest that the pay gap between men and women, even if it has narrowed, is still a grievance.

Karen Pine, professor of developmental psychology at Hertfordshire University and author of Sheconomics, said: “When I have talked to women about their emotional relationship with money, for many there was still a feeling that they didn’t deserve more.

“Women have been socialised to be people-pleasers. They don’t want to appear greedy or grabbing. When they have to adopt an assertive attitude to money — asking for what they are worth — many of them experience a conflict.”

Studies do show that money is an important factor in happiness: the well-off are happier than the very poor. However, that effect tails off once basic needs are met. The phenomenon is reflected in a recent study by Pine of 700 women and their attitudes to shopping and spending money.

“Years ago women didn’t have independent incomes, and now many of them are financially independent,” she said. “What I found was that 79% — an alarming statistic — told me they would go on a spending spree in order to cheer themselves up.

“Many women are using shopping and spending as a way of regulating emotions.”

Spending, however, doesn’t buy happiness. “Many of them described a buzz at the time, but it was short-lived,” said Pine. “Then they experienced buyer’s remorse and came down to earth with a bump.”

Stevenson and Wolfers also point out that over the past two decades many men, as well as women, have experienced financial concerns. “The real wages (after inflation) of many men fell during much of this period,” they said. Yet it is women whose happiness has notably changed.

If money is not the key, what about families? Divorce rates and cohabitation have soared over the time in which women’s happiness has fallen. However, if they are important factors, say researchers, more unhappiness should be found among single mothers and the separated.

Stevenson and Wolfers concluded the relative decline in women’s happiness “is irrespective of the age, marital, labour market or fertility status of the group analysed”.

There is, of course, the possibility that women are simply being more direct about their happiness than they used to be. As the authors note: “Women may now feel more comfortable being honest about their true happiness and have thus deflated their previously inflated responses.”

However, the international scale of the trend seems to militate against this.

Though nobody has isolated a convincing reason for the decline in women’s happiness, there is a consensus of sorts. As Oswald put it: “The lead theory is that women’s lives have become more complicated in many dimensions, unlike men who have to balance a smaller number of balls.

“It is probably still true that men do fewer things well.”

Pine agreed: “One can always point to increasing pressures on women. We are now trying to have careers and families and look good for longer. It may be that in trying to have it all we are feeling that we may have set ourselves an impossible goal.”

Complexity is stressful — and women’s supposed skills at multi-tasking are no remedy.However, critics of feminism take a more sceptical view. Complexity is not the problem, they say: it’s more to do with women discovering that “equality” with male life is not all it was cracked up to be.

To the writer Neil Lyndon, author of No More Sex War, it is a vindication of his view that feminists have long been blind to the stresses of male life. “(Feminists) are so determined to insist that women are in a position of inequality and disadvantage, they cannot see that to repair the disadvantages of women you also have to address the inequalities of men,” he said.

“Men who are in work and have young children want to spend more time with their families. Feminists cannot see that. The ideology itself requires you to say that women are in a position of disadvantage, that it’s a society run by men for the benefit of men, and that there can’t be disadvantages for men.”

Women have got themselves into an impossible position, Lyndon suggests, and it won’t be remedied until there is proper equality and until no parent — man or woman — is expected, as many men are, “to go to work at 7am and get back at 9pm”.

Amid all this hypothesising and argument, what should a pragmatist do? Siobhan Freegard, founder of the website Netmums, discovered her own measure of how women’s happiness has declined. A survey of her site users indicated that levels of the “baby blues” experienced by new mothers have risen sharply since 30 years ago. So she set about asking experts to formulate a programme to help.

“In our research one key problem that emerged was that we all move around a lot now,” said Freegard. “About 60% of women no longer live near their extended family and the same proportion of women haven’t replaced that family support with a new social network. The whole breakdown of community is a factor.

“So we set people tasks. Be part of networks. Join groups. Speak to an old lady. Talk to your shopkeeper. Phone someone you haven’t had a good chat with for ages and so on.”

The happiness of participants was tested before and after the programme — and at the end they were on average 16% happier.

Might such ordinary, everyday connections be more important to happiness than impossible dreams to have it all? Freegard suspects that might be the case.

“We pushed so hard for equal rights, for having the right to work, for having equal status, we pushed hard to have choice,” she said. “But what we hear back from many mums is: I have no choice, I have to work, I don’t love my career, my childminder is taking half my salary and I’d rather bring up my children myself but I can’t afford to.

“I’m not saying women shouldn’t work. If you enjoy your job and it’s a fulfilling career, that is a positive choice. But if it’s not . . . it’s almost in some ways that we got it all, then found that actually it wasn’t quite what we wanted.”

Vote for any party but not for Congress

Dear all Indian Husbands and their Family Members, Vote for any party, but not for Congress. Nowadays more than 57000 Indian Husbands are ending their lives in suicide every year due to the anti-husband, anti-family and anti-child biased and lopsided marital laws like Section 498A / Domestic Violence Act / CRPC125 / Adultery law / four different maintenance laws, all passed by the Congress. The entire family of Husbands has been converted into a Free ATM machine and they are being treated worse than an animal in this country due to all biased and lopsided law and policy by the Congress party. Inspite of The Honorable Supreme Court terming the Misuse of Section 498A as “Unleashing of a new Legal Terrorism on innocent husband’s family” and Domestic Violence Act as “one of the most clumsy drafted law”, the Congress led UPA government has not taken any corrective action and the entire family of husbands is suffering today because of that.  Whether the allegations are true or false, it’s merely on the basis of the verbal allegation of the wife (read married woman), that the entire family of husbands including his mother, sister (again read married women) are thrown out of their house under the Domestic Violence Act. Through this Domestic Violence Act, the Congress party has incited a woman vs. woman war and the price is paid by Indian men.  Just the wives need to say that, “I am anticipating Domestic Violence” from my partner (Men), be it a friend or any one and the man is thrown out of his own house and lands up in Railway Platform; as also the bank accounts will be frozen. Now it is up to the accused to prove her allegations are wrong in the court and she need not prove anything as her verbal allegations are construed as evidence, since the Congress led UPA Government thinks that all the wives / Daughter-in-law are born in Raja Harish Chandra’s Family, and hence can’t lie.  Do you know who has given wholesale free License to your wife to commit adultery and at the same time go scot free? – Congress. Do you know who has given wholesale free license to your wife to abuse your age old parents and sisters and at the same time go scot free? – Congress. Do you know who has given wholesale free license to your wife to throw out you and your old parents from their own home? – Congress. Do you know who has given wholesale free license to your wife to kill your un-born child and go scot free? – Congress. Do you know who has given wholesale free license to your wife to refuse to visit your own child once in a week at least? – Congress. Do you know even a terrorist have right to stay in his own home, but Indian husbands do not have any right to stay in his own home , if wife demand the same under Domestic Violence act and who has made such a law ? – Congress. Do you know who has given wholesale free license to your wife to beat, abuse, and refuse food to your child and you can’t even ask her a single question, as it will be termed as verbal abuse? – Congress. Do you know if your wife demand 1000 rupees for her kitty party and you give 800, it is a crime by you as per law and who made such law? – Congress. This is the state of the present Justice system in India and Gender Equality in India, a feat achieved by the Congress Government in the last 60 years.  For a wife even adultery is not a crime (it is a rewarding option and tax free money earning business for the whole life), but for a man even an allegation of “Name-calling” is crime and not only the man, his mother/sister/old father also can be put behind the bars under 498A or Domestic Violence Act. And such laws are made with the tax-payer’s hard-earned money, 82% of which comes from men. Well educated, working and healthy women (read wives) are rushing to the courts to demand aristocratic maintenance from their husbands to maintain their lavish lifestyles, by leveling false allegations as is evident from court records and at the same time do not miss a chance (provided by the Congress led UPA Government) to file false criminal cases under Section 498A, Domestic Violence Act, mentioning that their husband is ill-treating them and demanding money from them. However, the wives themselves openly demand money as a legal extortion and blackmailing and the police, the media and the courts are mute spectators or at time active participants in squandering husband’s money. And all this drama happens under the nose of the Congress led UPA Government which sits on the abuse of Indian men, especially husbands and is hell bent on passing one after another anti-male extortionary laws. On the contrary, if a husband is not able to earn money due to some reason or falls terminally ill, and his wife is earning money, yet he is not eligible for maintenance from his wife, irrespective of the fact that he had earned lacks of rupees and given to his wife prior to becoming disabled and such a man is told to either sell his body organs or go and commit suicide. Such a biased attitude is being meted out to Indian men under the Congress led UPA Government. So the question arises: Is Indian Husband is a Free ATM Machine for Indian wives? As per Congress the answer is:  Yes. It is pertinent to mention here that, presently a wife can claim maintenance from four different Laws, like Section 24 Hindu Marriage Act, Section 125 CrPC, Section 18 Hindu Adoptions and Maintenance Act and Domestic Violence act. This is abuse and wastage of resources for the Indian Judiciary System (which always cries foul of being overburdened), since for the same purpose, three to four different cases are filed in different courts sometimes across states. It not only wastes the Judiciary’s man Power, but is also a violation of Indian constitution, wherein it is clearly mentioned in Article 20, that for the same offence a person can’t be punished/tried more than once. Then why do we have four different maintenance cases against a Husband for the same alleged cause of action? ·  Crime Bureau data 2005: Married Men Suicide: 52k vs. Married Women Suicide 28K.Still there is no LAW to Protect Men why? ·  2006 Crime Bureau Data: Married Men Suicide: 55452 vs. Married Women Suicide: 29869. ·  2007 Crime Bureau Data: Married Men Suicide: 57593 vs. Married Women Suicide: 30064. Will Our LAW Maker change the section 304B of the IPC related to dowry deaths to section 304C (Sowry Death) and Section 498A (harassment to wife) to 498B (Sowry harassment by wife)? We have repeatedly requested the Congress led UPA Government by providing all the data and official statistics of suffering of Indian men in general and husbands in particular and demanded that all Gender Biased LAW should immediately be made crime based void of any assumption that women never lie and men are born as Criminals. "MEN/WOMEN" word to be replaced by word "PERSON" and word wife/husband to be replaced with the word "SPOUSE". But it has fallen on deaf ears of the Congress led UPA Government and in return the Union minister for Women and Child Development makes the following derogatory statements against Indian men while being in office: ·         It’s turn to suffer the Indian men, as women suffered for long. (Like as Muslim Kings had destroyed a lot of temple, so let’s demolish the entire Mosque in India). ·         Don’t trust Your Men; trust Condom in the name of reducing AIDS. (Forgetting the fact that the AIDS spreads by multiple partner sex and a condom is used for multiple partner sex, not for single partner sex, which we term as married couple) ·         It’s Diwali Gift to Indian women. (Within two weeks, four women sent behind the bars under first DV act case in Pune and one age old women left her own house as her daughter-in-law walk in her house with her all friends and parents)  Readers may choose to vote for Congress and ensure that more and more suffering follows for Indian men. Since it’s not only Congress, but all political parties believe that increasing the suffering of Husbands and their family members is termed as Social Service in the country since Indian Husbands and their family members cannot ensure their defeat or a reduction in their vote share. So making more and more anti-husband, anti-family, anti-child and anti-men biased and lopsided law in the country is not going to harm them. The Choice is with you and do not forget that only the crying baby gets the milk. Congress government has converted the Indian Criminal Justice system into a wholesale free money earning business through Legal Extortion from Husbands and their family members. Vote for any party, but not for congress and give a clear message that anti-husband, anti-men, anti-family and anti-child law and policy will not be accepted in this country by political party. Disclaimer: These are totally writer’s personal views. Readers may have a different opinion. The name and place has been changed to protect the Person’s Identity.

 

Marriage broken irretrievably? Grant Divorce

The Honorable Supreme Court has recently ruled that Irretrievable Breakdown of Marriage is no ground for divorce in a ruling. Taking strong exception to the same, the Law Commission has ruled that, the same should be made a ground for divorce. As is evident both views being contradictory to each other, either one of them are beneficial to the society and citizenry at large.

Marriage is a social institution and is the first step towards the formation of family. It gives the people, the much needed support to face the adversaries of life and is a source of happiness for any individual. However, when there is a clash of expectations between individuals and hidden agendas are involved or the mutual trust between partners is broken, the marriage ceases to exist in spirit and remains only on papers.

Irretrievable breakdown of marriage has not been laid down as a ground of divorce in Hindu Marriage Act; however there have been judgments where divorce has been granted on the same basis by the Honorable Supreme Court. But very recently, as mentioned, the Honorable Supreme Court denied divorce on the same grounds saying the law does not permit it. Analysis of the contradictions led to serious revelations. The divorces granted on “Irretrievable Breakdown of marriage” were those demanded by wives while the one recently rejected was demanded by husband.

This is nothing short of discrimination against husbands by the Honorable Supreme Court and is a defeat of human rights of husbands. Be it a man or a woman, a right to peaceful and dignified life is an unchallengeable one and has to be respected at any cost. End of marriage is not the end of life and if two people, after having married to each other are not happy with each other and all means of restoring their marriage have been exhausted, one does not see any reason not to grant them divorce and allow them to move on in life.

A relationship is meant to give support to an individual in a social context and not to form a burden and all relationships are quintessentially trust based. If the trust dies, so does the relation, maintaining it on papers is another fallacy like the relationship itself? A true and mature relationship is one, where even if there is a tiff between the partners, the same can be resolved by making one phone call no matter who makes the call. If any relationship fails this One Phone Call Test, it is better called off and that too in a manner which ensures happiness and mental peace for both the partners.

The Law Commission must be lauded for being so quick in responding to the call of making “Irretrievable Breakdown of marriage” a ground for divorce and calling upon the Center to consider the amendment to Hindu Marriage Act. This call is a triumph of human rights, especially for men, whose rights are often trampled in an over enthused spirit of Women Empowerment which unfortunately is not synonymous with Male Entrapment, the way currently it is being executed.

Save Indian Family Foundation, an NGO dedicated to promote Family Harmony and Gender Equality urges the Center to consider amending the Hindu Marriage Act for including “Irretrievable Breakdown of Marriage” as a ground for divorce.

Press Release voicing the concerns of Forgotten Women

Press Release

Sub: Raising voice of women forgotten in the Empowerment Brigade.

In the year 1910, Clara Zetkin, a German women’s rights advocate, proposed that “every year, in every country, there should be a celebration on the same day - a Women's Day - to press for their demands”. Ever since, International Women’s Day is being observed in various countries across the world.

In order to press for our demands that have been ignored and brushed aside by mainstream women’s organizations, lawmakers and our elected representatives, we, the members of All India Forgotten Women (AIFW) and Mothers and Sisters Initiative (MASI), are organizing a Dharna on the occasion of International Women’s Day, 8 March 2009, in front of the office of the National Commission of Women between 10:00 am and 1:30 pm.

In India, we not only have a Ministry dedicated to women’s welfare but also a National Commission for Women and several regional and local organizations representing the cause of women.

The Government of India is constantly doling out pro-women policies in the name of providing equal rights, imparting education, improving health, and encouraging women’s participation in all walks of life. It has passed several laws in the name of addressing problems such as dowry harassment, dowry death,  marital cruelty, domestic violence, rape, indecent representation of women, to name a few.

Women’s rights activists have been successful in pressuring the police, judiciary and media to take a lenient approach towards women and grant them special privileges compared to men. They constantly remind women of their “hard won” rights and privileges in the society, and the need to protect and exercise them.

In spite of all the above, we continue to hear that the status of women in the country is only worsening every day. One is bound to wonder why granting more and more privileges and protections to women would lead to worsening of the status of women in the society? Here is why:

The Ministry of Women and Child Development, the National Commission for Women and other powerful women’s organizations comprise of radical feminists who are anti-men and anti-family. These radical feminists have become self-appointed authorities who determine what is good for all women in the country, and have assumed proprietary rights on the drafting and implementation of all policies and laws related to women. In their regime, spread of anti-male sentiments and superficial appeasement of women take precedence over real empowerment of women. Laws pushed by radical feminists under the guise of empowering women are, in reality, weapons that facilitate abuse by women, violate basic human rights of men, women and children and promote family destruction.

In the last four years, over 123,497 women have been arrested under IPC Section 498A alone, without evidence or investigation, not for committing any crime under law, but only because they were related to a man. The recently amended Section 41 of CrPC, which redefines police powers of arrest, imposes greater accountability on the law enforcement machinery while carrying out arrests, and ensures that unnecessary arrests are avoided. While these amendments represent a step in the right direction to uphold basic human rights and constitutional rights of men and women, radical feminists are opposing these amendments. They parrot exaggerated statistics of crimes and injustices against women, label them as gender-driven discrimination and abuse, and press for draconian legislations that penalize the innocent.

Does penalizing innocent women under false cases bring justice to genuinely abused women?

Recent data from the National Crime Records Bureau indicates that nearly twice as many married men, compared to married women, commit suicide every year, unable to withstand verbal, emotional, economic and physical abuse and legal harassment. While every death of a young married woman is converted into a case of dowry death, leading to immediate arrest of the husband and in-laws, large-scale suicides of men are completely ignored. While husbands and their relatives are under constant suspicion leading to frequent violation of their basic human rights, wives are rarely ever questioned leave alone prosecuted if a husband dies or ends his life under similar circumstances. Suicides of men only make for the brief stories we often read in newspapers stating that a certain man “killed himself due to family issues or financial problems”. No Ministry has been set up to support our sons and brothers. No laws have been passed to protect them from abuse.

Is the pain of a mother who lost a son to domestic abuse or legal terrorism any less than that of a

mother who lost a daughter?

Radical feminists disparaged the Indian family as oppressive and Indian men as abusive, and portrayed the streets as far safer for women than their own homes. They have urged women to break free from the slavery of home, family and childrearing, and, instead, become slaves of government and corporate enterprises. Not surprisingly, radical feminists have neither been able to ensure the security nor the happiness that they had promised to women outside the home. They now cry foul saying that crimes and abuses against women have only been increasing. Notwithstanding the fact that men and women are equally vulnerable to violence and crime committed by members of either sex, radical feminists claim that crime against women is gender-driven, thus, pitting women against men in the society.

Does inciting a gender war solve women’s problems within and outside the home?

Radical feminists even went a step further to promote chaos in the society by pitting women against women. They introduced IPC Section 498A which allows arrests and jailing of innocent mothers and sisters of men based on a mere complaint by a disgruntled daughter-in-law. They introduced the Domestic Violence (DV) Act which allows a daughter-in-law to evict her mother-in-law out of her own property and render her homeless. If you think this is outrageous, here is the coup de gras: on the one hand radical feminists demanded that adultery be treated as a crime when committed by men. On the other hand, they demanded that adulterous women be considered as victims and not penalized under criminal law. They ensured that the DV Act empowers a wife to violate marital norms with impunity and also claim residence and maintenance rights in spite of being unfaithful to the husband. Through the DV Act they also sought to grant live-in partners and concubines the same legal status as a legally wedded wife. The end result is that the protections and privileges, granted to a live-in-partner or concubine, violate the rights of a legally wedded wife and dependent female members of a man’s family.

Does women's equality mean empowerment of morally bankrupt women at the expense of

responsible, family-loving women?

The Ministry of Women and Child Development claims that safeguarding the interests of children is paramount in its agenda. However, the same Ministry has left no stone unturned to ensure that children are mercilessly torn away from fathers in cases of marital separation or divorce. The Ministry pushed the DV Act which even allows for the passing of ex-parte orders to take away the custody of a child from the father without a just and fair enquiry to assess the suitability of guardianship by either or both parents. The Act includes provisions for passing of restraining orders that eliminate all contact between a father and child, only based on the self-serving statements of a vindictive wife. Thus, the DV Act violates a child’s right to the love and affection of both parents, and promotes a fatherless society.

Does women’s empowerment mean destroying family harmony and creating a fatherless society?

Radical feminists raise a hue and cry about dowry harassment by husbands and in-laws and portray India as a country where brides are routinely burned for dowry. They spread paranoia about how unsafe women are in their marital homes because of the “evil practice” of dowry. The same radical feminists do not oppose extravagant marriages or giving of dowry. Consequently, the ever increasing marriage related expenses in the present consumerist economy are causing mortal fear in the minds of parents about giving birth to a girl. Radical feminists who turn a blind eye to excessive marriage expenditures and giving of dowry, but indulge in alarmism about dowry harassment are, in fact, promoting female feticide and discrimination against the female child. These very feminists turn around and blame all the problems of their own creation on what they call the “male-dominated society” in order to garner funds from international agencies, and also to lobby for more stringent anti-male laws that aid legal terrorism and violation of basic human rights.

Is the cause of women’s empowerment synonymous with Gobbelian propaganda, legal terrorism

and human rights violations?

Radical feminists, who claim to represent the interests of all women, have been pushing for more and more rights and privileges, disregarding how many existing rights, opportunities and privileges are poorly utilized and even quite often misused by women. They advocate rights and privileges for women without prescribing any concomitant duties or responsibilities towards the family and society. Consequently, today, there are more women who are separated or divorced. There are more women indulging in illicit relationships. There are more unwanted pregnancies. There are more women raising fatherless children. There are more literate but uneducated and morally bankrupt women, who are living parasitic lives by siphoning money away from an estranged husband or partner. There are more women who abuse laws to destroy families and the society, as they themselves self-destruct.

Is this the notion of women’s empowerment that hard-working, self-respecting and individualistic

women subscribe to?

It will not be an exaggeration to state that the Ministry of Women and Child Development and organizations like the National Commission for Women are protecting the interests of unscrupulous women, while the rest of the society pays the price.

The recent Mangalore pub incident and the responses of radical feminists represent another good example of women’s empowerment gone awry.

In the past, when rural women destroyed liquor shops and beat up men who drank or sold alcohol, they became heroes and their acts were cheered. Achieving prohibition was seen as a victory of the women’s movement and a sign of women’s empowerment. In the recent times, the Minister of Women and Child Development dealt a death blow to the women’s movement by championing urban women’s right to frequent pubs and drink as a token of their empowerment and equality with men. The National Commission for Women seems to be more passionate about protecting women indulging in the luxury of drinking alcohol in pubs, while 30% of Indian women still walk up to 10 kilometers everyday to fetch a pot of drinking water, which is a basic necessity.

It has become crystal clear that radical feminists only create more problems in the name of solving existing ones. They can neither device nor support sustainable solutions, policies and laws which will actually benefit women because if the status of women improves, the gender card will be rendered redundant, and can longer be used to reap any political or financial gains. The survival of radical feminist outfits and politicians who dance to their tunes depends on stoking anti-male sentiments, destroying the family and creating chaos in the society.

It is high time sensible, responsible and enlightened women take charge of the situation and restore sanity in the society before things go out of hand. All India Forgotten Women (AIFW) and Mothers and Sisters Initiative (MASI) comprise of women who work towards promoting family harmony and true gender equality, with the goals of maintaining social stability and nurturing responsible citizens in the country.

On the occasion of International Women’s Day 2009, we make the following demands to the Government of India:

·         We demand immediate implementation of CrPC Amendments 2008 to protect us and our dear ones from legal terrorism and human rights violations.

·         We demand equal protection to men and women under law.

·         We demand laws and policies that promote family harmony.

·         We demand severe penalty for anyone misusing legal provisions to settle personal scores.

·         We demand that balanced, responsible, family-loving women are given charge of the Ministry of Women and Child Development and the National Commission for Women.

·         We demand a Ministry for Men to cater to the needs and welfare of our brothers and sons.

We request esteemed members of the print and electronic media to join us and provide unprecedented coverage for our event.

Event supported by:

www.savefamily.org, www.saveindianfamily.org, www.mynation.net, www.protectindianfamily.org, www.ghrs.in

 

Severely Condemning derogatory ad on men

Save Indian Family Foundation, strongly and severely condemns the Derogatory Ad being telecast at the behest of Kitply Industries. The ad shows a young timid man getting married to a woman and on the first night the bed crumbles. The wife asks the husband, “Kitply nahi laye kya?” (Have you not bought Kitply?) and slaps the husband.

Openly, brazenly and cold – bloodedly this ad not only depicts Domestic Violence on men but also promulgates it, inspiring women to do it and telling men that this is a way of life. World over international studies have proved it beyond doubt that Domestic Violence is not a gender specific issue and is a matter of equal concern for both men and women.

The situation is far worse in India wherein gender biased, lopsided, avaricious, pernicious, draconian, anachronous and unconstitutional anti – male marital laws fail to recognize the presence of Domestic Violence and acknowledge the same for men. Yes, Domestic Violence laws in India do not consider the fact that men too could be victims of Domestic Violence the way women are presumed and prejudiced to be and the Domestic Violence law in India does not allow men to make complaints of Domestic Violence in India.

This despite the fact holding true that as per Government records i.e. suicide date published by National Crime Records Bureau, every year 56, 000 married men are committing suicide which is considered as a social service in a great country like India, where 82 % of taxes are paid by men. Neither do men have a Men Welfare Ministry for them nor a National Commission for Men to look into their grievances, whereas animals do have. The condition of Indian men is worse than animals in India.

To add to the woes men are subject to the constant fear of being dragged into false cases of dowry harassment and domestic violence draining them financially, socially, morally and spiritually in addition to being victims of Domestic Violence as well at the hands of their vindictive and vicious wives and in – laws who do not forget to file false cases of dowry harassment on the innocent men and their families and drag them to police station and court and unleash Legal Terrorism on them and extort money legally from them.

As if all this was no less, when corporates like Kitply Industries rain on men and promote Domestic Violence on men as a norm and when confronted for the same, shamelessly claim that it has been shown in a humorous mood, and shrug away from accountability. The contention that the ad was shown in a light spirit is subject to critical analysis and not becoming of a brand name Kitply Industries.

Save Indian Family Foundation, the single largest umbrella NGO for about 15 different NGOs fighting not only for men’s rights but also for Gender Equality and Family Harmony, severely condemns such derogatory ads and demands apology from Kitply Industries, failing which Save Indian Family Foundation will be forced to issue legal notices to them to respond properly.

One can only imagine the kind of euphoria that would have been generated if they had shown a man slapping a woman in similar manner. So when activists championing the cause of Equality for Women are crying foul, why are they now silent when Gender Equality is critically endangered and its existence seriously jeopardized with such derogatory ad content. This only depicts the hollow goals with which such activists work and want to rake in the mullah in the name of Women Empowerment and feminism but do not believe in actual equality based on truth and justice.

Save Indian Family Foundation re – iterates its demand of an apology from Kitply Industries and once again puts this question to the civil society and the government that how long are they continuing to consider men as second class citizens in their own country?

NCW caught red handed speaking lies

National Commission of Women (NCW) needs to be banned for its unethical activities.



1) They openly support adulterous women by claiming them as victims and seek amendments to grant maintenance to adulterous women.

2) They openly say, DO NOT BELIEVE THE MEDIA REPORTS.

3) They openly speak white lies as depicted below in the mail conversation between them. Read on.





Would the NCW like to clarify what does it mean by harsh?



1) Sending innocent mothers and sisters on the basis of an unverified complaint is not harsh?



2) Shielding 56, 000 husband killers is not harsh?



3) Fudging statistics to get foreign funds for implementing anti - family, avaricious, pernicious, draconian, anachronous, anti - male laws and unleashing them unto the society is not harsh?



4) Openly protecting the rights of adulterous, promiscuous women is not harsh?



5) Demanding multiple maintenance from males under pretext of false allegations is not harsh?, And last but not the least.



6) Turning away old mothers tortured by their unscrupulous daughter - in - laws and her parents is not harsh, saying this does not come under their ambit?



WILL THE NCW ANSWER?



And what realities they are talking of, why don’t they come out in public if they are so astute, devout and sincere?



with regard to your queries you are hereby informed that

1. that NCW does not send innocent mothers and sisters on the basis of an unverified complaint to jails we dont have such power in the first place

2. that the NCW does offer support to women in distress which may also include sisters and mothers and just daughter in laws therefore your presumptions on NCW is factually misleading

3. we do not fudge statistics the staistics are manintained by NCRB and not by NCW

4. ncw has not protected the rights of adulterous women i do not know from where you have gathered such information please do not beleive in media reports

5. we have not ever turned away old mothers etc any women requiring help is provided be it a mother sister or daufghter in law any one requiring assitance can approach us

6. we do not distinguish or categorise in fact you would be surprised to note that the NCW recommendations on implementation of Dowry related acts is that first and foremost resort to counselling and mediation with intention to save the marriage and family and only where a prima facie case exists then the legal recourse is to be taken to

any more queries ???

yogesh mehta

law officer

1) Then why has the NCW not taken any action for the 1, 20, 000 women arrested from 2004 -2007 on a mere FIR? Does NCW consider it right? Does it not consider it should make a move to protect those mothers and sisters who are harassed by police before being tried or convicted? Just answer Yes or NO.



2) Can NCW give me the statistics of the number of women as mothers and sisters it has helped vis - a vis the number of daughter - in - laws it has helped? Just answer Yes or NO. Does NCW maintain such categorized information. Just answer Yes or NO. If not reasons.



3) If you do not fudge statistics, then how did NCW made a claim that 70 % women are denied maintenance on adultery grounds and later when asked to publish source data for it, categorically denied having such information. News link. Do you consider this as fudging of statistics. Just answer Yes or NO. NCW Supporting Adultery. See Link1



4) It is the same media reports based on which you keep shouting on violence on women. And now that I have official email from NCW telling me not to believe media reports. Let the media also know about it. If NCW does not protect the rights of adulterous women by making propositions to remove the adultery clause in maintenance. Do you think this is not supporting adulterous women. Just answer Yes or NO.



5) I would like you to provide me details to convince me how many cases have you have resolved with mediation and how many women other than wives have been genuinely helped by NCW.



PS: We, at Save Indian Family Foundation do not consider the advice to file a case as genuine help as it does not help either. So answer keeping this note in mind.



1) It has been brought to NCW’s notice several times thro’ media. And now also I am bringing it to your notice. What can you do for them? Or better what can you do to prevent such mishaps in future?



2) So categorically NCW cannot substantiate its claim of having supported mothers and sisters?



3) Some cases?? How many judgments do you have? The article makes no mention of that. And when NCW was sent an RTI application for data supporting the claim that in 70 % of cases, women are denied maintenance for adultery why did the NCW reply that it does not maintain such information. If the NCW does not maintain such information, why was it published in Media and if the information was not given by NCW why has NCW not taken action against the tabloid for printing information without approval. This means NCW has got the information published and then later denied having source of that information. Do you consider its ethical on part of NCW to behave in such a manner. I want an answer in YES or NO.



4) “NCW also sought another significant amendment to Section 125, saying that said adultery should no longer be a ground for denying maintenance to a woman. ”



This is from the article. Still you say NCW has not made such a claim and repeat it as well? Are you not writing white lies?? At least make some background research before writing an email. You are being watched by 15, 000 members. And on a discussion note, I would like to know why does NCW consider adultery should be made a civil offense? Adultery in a relationship tantamount to breach of trust. What makes NCW think per se that it is a civil offense and why should a woman be provided maintenance who has walked out of the relationship.



5) Read my point number 5 then revert back. I have asked for some information.



6) Oh sure I will, you do not worry about that.

Open Letter to oppose NCW's latest proposal

TO,



Dated: 03 September 2008,

Sub: Objections to NCW being awarded the status equivalent of a Court.

Dear Sir / Madam,

This is pertaining to the recent proposal of elevating the status of National Commission of Women to that of a court and giving powers equivalent of a Member of Parliament to the chairperson of the National Commission of Women.

Save Indian Family Foundation, Bangalore, a non – profit, non funded NGO promoted to the cause of spreading the message of gender equality and Family Harmony in the society since the past 2 – 3 years in addition to its efforts to help victims of misuse of marital laws and create awareness about the same has some strong objections to such a proposal owing to the following points:-

1) NCW, as designed to be an astute body working for the causes of women has miserably failed in its duties to protect the rights of women and safeguard the same as the arrest data published by the National Crime Records Bureau shows that close to 1, 20, 000 women have been arrested in the last four years for complaints under Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code. These women are the mothers and sisters of the husbands accused of false dowry allegations by unscrupulous women who fail to recognize family values and view marriage as a business opportunity to earn tax free money. Such women are shielded by the NCW and as such, NCW does not deserve to be given this special consideration. News link

2) Very recently the NCW had made quite obnoxious an amendment to demand maintenance for live – in partners and to remove the clause of adultery as a reason to deny maintenance to promiscuous and adulterous women. Such a proposal in itself is a direct insult of the sacrosanct social institution called marriage and to those devout and faithful wives who are committed to their husbands. Granting equal privileges as wives to a live – in partner directly degrade the status of marriage in the society which is a solemnized vow in presence of family elders whereas there is no commitment factor in a live – in relationship. And suggesting maintenance for live – in partners is luring more women to enter into multiple relationships and demand maintenance from each partner. This is a direct attempt to degrade and demean the existing status of women in the society. Ironically this statement is coming from NCW, supposed to be working for upliftment of women in the society. Thus NCW, working to protect the rights of promiscuous and adulterous women at the cost of devout and sincere women does not deserve to be of equivalent status as that of a court.

3) In order to support its above claim NCW went ahead and published that in 70 % of cases women are denied maintenance on grounds of adultery. SIFF activists when filed for data to support the claim made by NCW, through an application under Rights to Information Act, 2005, NCW in its reply categorically denied maintaining any such data. It was a white lie published by NCW and a delirious attempt by NCW to fudge statistics and present an otherwise picture to realize vendetta best known to it. Such a body severely lacking integrity and accountability does not deserve such a position. News link.

4) A court of law, supposed to be a temple of justice, is a place where people get their grievances redressed in a procedural manner and such a temple has a very high demand to be fair, unbiased, impartial and just. Granting the status equivalent to court to a women’s commission is direct and in – the – face discrimination against men who are anyways facing a lot of discrimination even in the current scenario when NCW has no judgmental powers and every year more than double the number of men are committing suicides than women, thanks to the heavily lopsided and duplicated laws supported and pampered by NCW. One can only imagine the situation when such a body filled with people of anti – male views assumes a position of power

Hence keeping in view the above objections we severely condemn the proposal to elevate the status of NCW to that of a court and grant privileges equivalent to a Member of Parliament to the Chairperson of NCW and be dropped categorically and buried forever in the bud for larger public interest to restore faith and trust in the system.

Beautifully Priceless

Google Censorship

<>

The major search engines censor access to many web sites. 11 min

They all have internal organizations responsible for executing the censoring policies of their company. We can be confident that none of these organizations is called the “Censoring Division”. The people in these organizations may also sincerely believe that what they are doing is in the best interests of their users and that every single site that they block is “doing something wrong”.

The problem with Internet censoring is the same as any other form of censoring. As history has repeatedly demonstrated, once you start censoring it is very hard to stop. It is always possible to rationalize that people would be better off if they didn’t have access to certain information.

Google has often censored some of my own pages. These pages have completely and utterly disappeared from their search engines. They do not exist!

(And please do not bother writing to me to explain that this might be because their ‘blind’ algorithms might simply have changed - because I have far too much evidence pointing to the conclusion that these ‘algorithms’ include site-specific and/or page-specific instructions and I also know the internet extremely well.)

You see; Google has a problem. And it is this.

Just like the telephone companies, Google claims that it cannot possibly have any responsibility for what information flows through its system. After all, in much the same way that the telephone companies cannot possibly monitor all the billions of telephone conversations that flow through their systems, Google cannot possibly monitor all the information on the billions of webpages that it lists.

Or so it claims.

And, on the surface, this claim seems to be a reasonable one.

BUT!

If Google is, indeed, censoring information (e.g. delisting pages from its search engines or demoting them in the rankings because of their content) then, quite clearly, it is monitoring this information.

And if it is monitoring this information, then it can surely be deemed to be liable for the presentation of it!

And if this was the case then, for example, this would mean that Google could be held responsible for any libel that appeared on webpages that it had listed - or, perhaps, responsible for aiding terrorists etc etc etc.

In short; if Google admits to monitoring, then it can be held to be ‘liable’.

So, Google is somewhat stuck between a rock and a hard place.

On the one hand, it proudly proclaims to be a defender of free speech and that it would not dream of censoring (blocking, de-listing, demoting etc etc) any webpages of information, and it insists most strongly that, therefore, it cannot possibly be held liable for any of the content but, on the other hand, it does not want to upset governments; and it can only do this by doing what governments tell them.

And so Google has chosen to worm its way out of this dilemma by, quite simply, accommodating to the wishes of governments - and lying to the people about it.

Now some of my long-time readers might recall that the last time that I had a barney with Google - when, if you believe it, they removed all advertising from a single innocuous page concerning men’s issues on my other website - I had to maraud around for three or four days demonstrating to Google that I would trawl the internet here, there and everywhere in order to spread the news about Google’s heinous activities to whomsoever might seem interested - especially journalists.

And I think that what finally convinced Google to be more accommodating was me pointing out the fact that not only was I, clearly, a very energetic activist, but that rushing around the internet badmouthing Google would do absolute wonders for my site’s traffic - and that, therefore, I would find the experience most rewarding - which meant that I was very unlikely to stop badmouthing Google hither and thither - week after week if necessary.

My ads came back.

Well, it looks as if I am now going to have to create a fuss over www.HarrietHarmanSucks.Com - because its pages have been disappeared into the abyss - having all first appeared for a few days hovering between pages 5 and 20 following a search for “Harriet Harman”

And so my plan is this.

I am going to write a piece about why Google needs to be ‘controlled’ and restricted in some way and explain how outrageous it is that it should have so much power.

And then I am going to start marauding around the internet again.

Because, ….

I will not be censored!

LOL!

(And you can forget all the BS about Google being a private company and so it should be able to de-list or demote whatever pages it likes, because it is illegal for companies to cheat people. And if Google is censoring my pages, then it is cheating the people most horribly!)

The alternative, I suppose, is to re-write the pieces so that they are less ‘hostile’.

Hmmm.

I’ll think about it.

Maybe if I grovelled to Harriet Harman in my pieces instead of castigating her Google would re-list my pages.

Grovel. Grovel.

LOL!

Huh!

I would rather that my missus be torn apart and devoured slowly by a gruesome herd of flesh-eating crocodiles.

(While I watched her writhing in agony, ate ice cream, and chatted to my new girlfriend, of course!)

Anyway. The piece above is very good indeed, and definitely worth reading.

+ We have private companies like Google deciding what we can and can’t see based on their self-interested readings of poorly-drafted national laws, taking advice from unnamed and unaccountable Government agencies and telling nobody what is going on. Bill Thompson

And, of course, this is one of the ways in which western governments intend to stifle dissent.

This is the deal in a nutshell.

Government: “If you, Google, do not disappear from view those most effective pieces that are hostile to us, then we shall bring some kind of law to bear upon you.”

Google: “Yes Sir. No Sir. Three bags full, Sir.”

Government: “But you must not tell the people of this secret deal.”

Google: “Yes Sir. No Sir. Three bags full, Sir.”

There is no question in my mind that this is going on.

And this means that we do not have a democracy.

Of course, Google would not dare to nobble websites that were very influential - because too many influential people might get upset about it.

So, between them, Google and the government keep it all secret and under the carpet.

In other words, as usual, our own governments - and, in this case, Google - are cheating us.

And talk about hypocrisy! - with all our politicians forever criticising the Chinese government for blocking access to websites that are critical of government and its officials, when they are doing something very similar over here.

Indeed, our governments - through their officials - are lying to us all the time.

Furthermore, when, at the time, I did a whole load of research into the matter of ‘adverts’ and the ‘blacklisting’ of them, it became fairly clear to me that the sites that had lost their adverts were mostly on the right side of the political spectrum in that they were often anti-feminist and/or not politically correct.

So, as in so many other areas, my guess is that internet activists who are anti-feminist and/or not politically correct are also having to cope with the customary institutionalised biases against them; but this time, with the aid of Google.

But decent lefties must also be very much concerned about this, firstly, because it might not be too long before those who are pulling the strings are more right-wing and, secondly, because “men’s issues” have precious little to do with being on the left or the right of the political spectrum; because when it come to issues of concern to ‘men’, the official left and right are just as bad as each other.

In other words, all men should be very concerned indeed about Google’s underhand censorship because not only does this undermine the democratic process most seriously, it also means that those activists who are fighting the corner for ‘men’ (rightly or wrongly) are being unfairly treated and that the issues of concern to ‘men’ are - once again - being purposely sat upon and hidden.

News Coverage for Women's Rights Equality Day

1) Deccan Chronicle Coverage

2) Deccan Herald Coverage

3) DNA Mumbai Coverage

4) Fresh News Coverage

5) Jansamacharnet Coverage

6) Mangaloreancom Coverage

7) Netindia123com Coverage

8) Sahara News Coverage

9) TOI Coverage

10) Yahoo News Coverage

11) Webindia123.com Coverage

12) The Indian.com Coverage

13) Newkerala.com Coverage

Recognition of women’s rights on Women’s Rights Equality Day August 26, 2008

On the occasion of Women’s Rights Equality Day on 25th August, we would like you to note the harassment and arrests of 1,15,645 women in India in last 4 years under dowry laws (section 498a) without trial or any investigation. This is the worst kind of shameful atrocities committed on women by a nation whose president herself is a woman. Thousands of women are dragged to police stations, harassed, threatened, blackmailed and finally arrested every month. The Prime Minister Manmohan Singh must intervene immediately to stop these atrocities on women as the other concerned ministers have failed to address this serious issue.

It is ironic that women are the worst victims of the misuse of dowry laws and all these women are considered “guilty till proven innocent”, which is against the cardinal principles of natural justice. Arrested women include elderly women as old as 92 years to pregnant women to minor girl child going to schools. Is this women’s empowerment?

Hearing our vociferous outrage through protests all over India, Renuka Choudhary, Minister for Women and Children of India invited our representations for discussions on June 25th 2008. We hoped that some common sense will prevail and the arrests will end. All the discussions between our representatives and Renuka Choudhary failed as the minister refused to give any commitments towards stopping these atrocities on innocent women.

It is a national shame that so many women are arrested by laws which are meant to protect women. It is like the fence eating the crop. It’s a pity to note that this destruction of families is happening under the patronage of the Indian Legal System in the barb and paradoxical veil of “Women Empowerment and Protection”.

Although drafted with the sanest of intentions; to provide women with security in a marriage, of late, due to the large number of false cases making their way to courts, the protector’s shield has become the assassin’s weapon. The women NGOs also, who are supposed to be working as watchdogs, have turned into bloodhounds by discriminating between women related to husbands and wives and failing to recognize, empathize and redress the grievances of those fateful mothers and sisters who have been through the ordeal of seeing their son and brother suffering at the hands of an unjust and almost defunct legal system.

Save Indian Family Foundation, an international network of individuals and NGOs, is working for promotion of Gender Equality and Family Harmony, makes a pleading before your Excellency/good office on behalf of the bereaved and beleaguered mothers and sisters, victimized under false allegations of dowry harassment by their daughters –in – law and their advisors/parents, to kindly look into this matter. One complaint from the daughter –in – law lands the whole family including ailing senior citizens, minor children, as well as pregnant women behind bars and ruins their life in a whiff of a moment. All this happens without investigation and in most of the cases, hefty ransoms are demanded to settle the case.

As per National Crime Records Bureau, in the last 4 years, (2004 – 2007), 1, 15, 645 innocent women have been arrested without investigation / trial under 498A cases.

1) Is this women empowerment- that on an unverified complaint of one woman, three women are imprisoned (on an average) and deemed “Guilty until proven innocent”?

2) Umpteen numbers of cases have been found where the girls’ side, filing such complaints were found to be hiding vital facts about the girl and they in fact file these cases when the hidden facts(affairs, diseases, unnatural tendencies and preferences, etc.) are exposed. Has 498A been designed to seek revenge from and harass husband’s family legally?

3) Is the pain of a mother / sister less when she loses a son / brother than when she loses a daughter / sister?

4) As per suicide statistics provided by National Crime Records Bureau, for the years 2005 and 2006, close to 52, 483 and 55, 452 married men, respectively, have committed suicide as opposed to 28, 188 and 29, 869 married women. But yet there is no law to protect our brothers and sons. Why?

5) According to a report by Center for Social Research, there is only 2 % conviction in 498a cases, which means the law is misused to the tune of 98 % and yet it has not been scrapped. This clearly shows the inaction of the government and the apathy meted out to men and their family members, be it a man or a woman in India.

Today on Women’s Rights Equality Day we demand that,

1) Minister of Women and Child Development, Renuka Choudhary should resign having failed miserably in protecting the 1, 15, 645 women arrested without trial / investigation in cases under Section 498A IPC and Jayaprada be made the minister for Women and Child Development.

2) Mothers and sisters of men too are given equal status and their grievances as women are also heard and redressed by State Women Commissions as well as National Commission for Women and the Women and Child Development Ministry.

3) We demand that all cases registered under 498A be properly investigated by a police officer of the level of DCP before making any arrests or registering any complaint the police has written permission from the DCP- in compliance with 1994 Supreme Court Judgment 1994 AIR 1349 SCC (4) 260 Joginder Kumar vs. UOI. It is to be understood that 498a is a serious criminal offense and registering a criminal offense against any person without investigation can lead to serious degradation of the person’s social reputation and irreparable damage to life and career, apart from unfathomable human rights violation and wastage of governmental resources and hence public’s money.

4) Such acts need strong condemnation and the perpetrators of false cases need to be severely punished as they are maligning the system and blocking the path of justice for genuine victims. The State should initiate prosecution suo motu against those found to be misusing laws affecting families and filing false cases under Dowry Harassment laws and Domestic Violence just to realize their personal vendetta.

5) The words man / woman be replaced by person and the words Husband / wife be replaced by spouse to make the laws gender neutral.

6) Our brothers and sons should also get a chance to redress their woes of Domestic Violence by allowing them to make complaints under Domestic Violence Act 2005 amending it to make it gender neutral.

Gender Equality cannot come by way of Gender Discrimination and stereotyped, anachronous and generalised assumptions, which can only help to undermine the spirit and definition of any law. Taking the statements of the girl’s side as “Gospel Truth” reflects sheer lack of jurisprudence and grave inefficiency in implementation of laws on the government’s part, which needs to be rectified with immediate effect so that innocent law abiding citizens do not become a victim of the system made to protect them.

Place: Bangalore Thanking You

Date: 25 August 2008

(Save Indian Family Foundation)



www.saveindianfamily.org
www.savefamily.org
9342853272
9845143724

Yes I demanded dowry, but never got it

All the characters referred to below are fictitious and bear no resemblance with anyone living or dead whatsoever. Any co-incidence is purely co-incidental and unintentional.

Dowry? A sensational word, isn’t it? Evokes strong emotions for the ‘married woman’. Unlawful demands from the husband’s side to the bride’s side like a scooter, car, fridge, cash, jewels, etc. etc. Seems like a scene straight from a social cinema, depicting the ‘married woman’ as a liability. This is what the media has always represented dowry and dowry seeking money mongers as, and so this is what the society has come to know of it.

But the definition of dowry is far wider than that entailed above as put in Indian Penal Code Section 498A as any ‘unlawful demand’ made by husband and / or his relatives. But what is ‘unlawful’ has not been described. It has been left to anyone’s imagination and depends on the intensity of the ‘married woman’s’ tears at time of the complaint.

The other day I happened to meet Jignesh, who has been accused under section 498A for allegedly making ‘unlawful demand’ to his wife. So I happened to chat with him as to what was the need to make any ‘unlawful demand’ from his wife when he himself earned a handsome salary working with an MNC at a prestigious position? Excerpts of my chat with him,

Me: “Well sad to know that you are facing criminal charges, but I fail to understand that when you are yourself so well placed, what made you demand?”

Jignesh: “So you seem to have decided the verdict yourself as is evident from your question.”

Me: “Hey man, I did not mean that.”

Jignesh: “It’s OK, am used to it, but it is a truth that I demanded dowry from her. You heard it right, Yes I demanded dowry but never got it.”

Me: “I see. Do you mind sharing your demands?”

Jignesh: “Not at all. I demanded our cultural values from her; I demanded as much respect from her for my parents, as I have for her parents. I demanded support from her to build my family. I demanded a feeling of oneness with contemporaries and love for the young ones in our family. I demanded restraint and patience to understand each other to build a stronger familial foundation. I demanded an anticipated expectation to be as much loyal and faithful to me as I am to her. Since she and her parents, especially her mom did not have all these, they thought these demands were ‘unlawful ‘, and filed a case on me and my innocent family under Section 498A IPC.”

Me: “I see. Hats off to you and sorry once again for that question, it was just framed badly, not intended that way.”

Jignesh: “That is fine; this is the pill society gives to victims of 498A, the Anti – dowry law. But I have no qualms in saying that I demanded dowry, for if what I demanded amounts to dowry in today’s era of Woman Protection and Woman Empowerment, then so be it. After all times are changing. Definitions of 1960 cannot work today.”

Save the Society

1 in 6 persons in Delhi is Likely to face 498a (Dowry) Law soon, which is not simple as Law is arrest without investigations, non Bailable.

Ministry of Women and child development is currently in the process of talking to organizations fighting to stop misuse of Dowry and other women protection Laws. Some of these groups are demanding that Section 498a, Indian Penal Code (Dowry Law) should be applicable only to husbands and not to his relatives; also it should be made non - cognizable so that arrests are made only after investigations. Recently Gender Human Rights Society Regd. was called on 1st Aug, and on 18th Aug MASI (Mothers and sisters Initiative Regd.) a women organization fighting for preventing misuse of women protection Laws is invited.

Some foreign (UNAID) funded Women organizations are writing to ministry that ministry should not talk to men organizations for reasons best known to them. They do not want a balanced family system to exist in India as it is the greatest impediment to their impeachment policies aimed at large scale destruction of Indian society and culture. Whereas non funded organizations like Gender Human Rights society Regd. strongly say the demand that ministry should not talk to men is absurd, and a foreign trick to harm India. Marriage is a social institution run by both men and women and hence the views of both the sides need to be taken into due consideration.

With 1 in 6 persons in Delhi alone likely to face 498a (Dowry LAW) complaint, the arrest without investigation, non Bailable can lead to mass misuse of law and legal terrorism unleashed on them. A significant population is already suffering, and all over India non funded organizations are being formed to amend this Law as the government has turned its blind eye and deaf ear to the sufferings of lacs of people suffering from misuse of dowry related and other women protection laws. About 86 % of women in Delhi Tihar Jail are due to Dowry Law, so this Law is harming everyone including women.

Also Domestic Violence Act, 2005 should be reviewed, the organizations are asking. They say DV law in effect from Oct 2006 is totally one sided, and can be used to throw men, of joint family, out of their own houses. Even Supreme Court has said that DV Law is loosely drafted, and including houses of Relatives of husbands in the DV Law can lead to social chaos. A renowned Delhi High court Judge in his detailed judgment on DV Law has said this new Law has a perfect recipe for social disaster.

Sandeep Bhartia, president of Gender Human Rights Society (Regd.) says there are 40 new Law proposals for women in pipeline under influence from foreign countries funding radical and one sided women organizations. In order to prevent a fatherless society in creation and reinstate gender harmony, these new Law proposals should involve Judges also as Judges are difficult to be influenced by foreign funding. Also they have given written requests to the ministries to involve organizations fighting for preventing misuse of women protection laws in the Law drafting process by the ministry.

A third of children in some countries are already being harmed by fatherless families, let’s not let that happen in India. let’s stop well funded radical feminists by involving neutral organizations and Judges in the Law drafting process by the WCD ministry.

Looks like the war between well funded Radical Feminists organizations and others non funded organizations is just beginning, we should tread this path carefully for the betterment of society .